A little overwhelmed! (prayers please)

I just finished typing a very long post and it all got erased…I AM LOSING IT ;)

On Monday we went to my ultra-sound appt. as I already posted about. I don’t think I mentioned how the Perinatologist went on and on about the fact that I am taking baby aspirin, T3, and hydrocortisone. I basically tuned him out while he chatted about his concerns and yada-yada. I really didn’t feel the need or interest to listen to him because I am following Dr. Hilgers’ protocol and most of the time I have found that doctors disagree with his treatments.

My mid-wife called me yesterday to tell me that the Perinatologist gave them a three page report which she said was “scary” saying that I need continuous ultra-sounds done throughout my pregnancy to monitor the growth of my baby and perhaps an extra dose of steroids during labor to help my body deal with the physical stress. WTF? I really don’t understand why he would say all of this. Needless to say the mid-wife feels uncomfortable working with me since Dr. Hilgers has no authority over what she does for me during my pregnancy and labor. I asked her if I continue to listen only to Dr. Hilgers and follow his protocol will she still keep me as a patient and her answer was basically no. We went round and round about it for about 15 minutes. She said I need to see an ER here that she knows and feels comfortable with and based on what that ER says about my thyroid, elctrolyte blood level and adrenal glands then she will decide what to do next. I went ahead and did the blood work she suggested and made an appt. with the ER for April 30th but even if the ER wants to change Dr. Hilgers protocol for me I do NOT want to!!!! I called PPVI and asked them to have Dr. Hilgers write me a letter explaining why he has me taking certain drugs and the nurse said it would be weeks before he was able to do that so she would try to get one of his fellow staff members to do so a bit sooner. In the meantime I guess I have to follow what I am being told to do here in Richmond. So I feel like these are my choices:

a) Go to the ER appt. and follow anything they tell me…
b) Find a different mid-wife at a different hospital and then not disclose all of Dr. Hilgers protocol…
c) Have a home birth
d) Any other suggestions are more than welcome.

I am just frustrated about this whole situation because it is not the first time I have come across Dr.s that disagree with Dr. Hilgers protocol.

Oh, while I am griping about things I might as well vent about the fact that I went to get my blood draw today and the registrar shouted out in front of other patients that “your face is getting FAT! Your face is chubby!” Then she proceeded to take me into the registrar office and bring her co-worker over to point out that my face is getting chubby! I said that’s nice of you to say (sarcastic of course) and she just laughed and asked me if I am eating the right foods. I told her I go to Cold Stone Ice-Cream sometime (panicking of course for some reason why I look fat) and she said “no that wouldn’t do it…are you drinking enough water?” I just wanted to die at this point. I wish people would avoid the words “fat” and “chubby” right now….