I got back from NY Monday morning around 3:00am. I didn't wake up that day until 2:30 p.m. Crazy! That really through me off but I just can't handle lack of sleep very well!!! Anyways, I have been getting horrible headaches lately and I think it might from my huge consumption of caffeine while in NY and then cutting back after the trip. I know I should just give it up all together but waking up in the morning is literally a painful experience. I am just to tired. Dh's parent's weren't to surprised about the anniversary party because there was just one to many slip ups with the secret that they figured it out when someone finally called them directly asking for directions and the time of the party. OOPS! Oh well, everyone still had a great time. Dh is still in NY. He got a job up there and has a car to use so it worked out for him to earn some extra money for us up there instead of being home with me. Ugh! I am not going to complain about this though because I am grateful that he got some extra work this summer. I am not sure how long he'll be gone but I think that is going to throw off ttc. Last we BD was three days before my peak day. So I really don't think that cuts it. Is a 10 K considered peak if it doesn't have an L with it? If that's the case then this cycle is probably a waist too and I am taking all these drugs for nothing. I really miss Dh so much! My first night alone in our house I slept horrible. I felt like I had one eye opened all night because I was so scared but now I am getting used to it.
Well, I feel kind of like I have been bombarded with pregnancy news lately and I am not handling it to well. The first some of you might of heard of. She made a CD talking about coping with infertility. Well, I had asked my BIL about this woman and her husband since he knows them and he said you she is 4-5 months pregnant. WTH? Last I heard she hadn't been able to get pregnant for nine years and wasn't seeking any form of treatment. Turns out she went to see this very holy priest who prayed over her for 1/2 hour during her fertile time and what do you know...she pregnant! I am very happy for her but just shocked!!! The next girl I know just called me yesterday to say she doesn't know what to do that two babies may be waiting for her and Dh from the adoption agency and it's along story but their getting a baby. I won't go on with all these stories but I am just crushed that things are going so wonderfully for them. I am happy for them too but I just hate the boat I am in. I wish that when I heard the news it wouldn't hurt so much. It really feels like I get the wind knocked out of me when someone tells me the news. Am I the only one who handles this so poorly?
Don't get me wrong....I am praying for all of us IF girls and that we get our along waited BFP's. I just wish I were a stronger person.
Today is CD 18 and I had 10 K. I guess this is peak day, but I am not sure because I had that heavy ovulation cramping on Monday afternoon and Tuesday morning...
P.s. I changed my blog back drop and header. What do you all think? Should I keep it or change it back to the last one? I know I still have to add my Fertile Thoughts title. But I am open for suggestions. I feel like I am in a rotten mood today...
Hey there. Sorry your DH is not home. I sleep with one eye open when George is gone too. I hate it! However, I do try and say Our Fathers to fall asleep - asking for protection from whatever my mind comes up with :) I do the same when I wake-up in the middle of the night. :)
ReplyDeleteConerning peak day - peak day is the last day you are K 10 or L - so the last day of 10K is peak even w/o L... or you can have 8cL and its peak bc you had the L - or you can have 8K and its peak bc you had the K - hope that helps :) You have 10K today... you wont know until tomorrow night if its peak and see no peak mucus all day tomorrow.
I like your new background... the white makes it easier to read :) and I think the flowers are really cute too.
Hope you get to feeling better :)
Thanks Nicole! You're so sweet. That was actually very helpful!!!
ReplyDeleteI like the new background too!
ReplyDeleteAnd you are not the only one who handles the news poorly. I thought I was the only one!
Amber,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that Lou is gone right now- that has got to be tough. At least you have Ottie (did I spell his name right?)~ Anyway, hang in there...things will hopefully settle down for you soon. Much love and hugs. xo. P.S. I love the blog. I changed mine too using shaggyblogs. They have such cute options, don't they? I couldn't decide because I loved them all! :) Yours looks great.
my husband used to be gone a few nights a week when we were in houston, it is always hard being alone. i'd always leave a ewtn on in the living room - i felt like it was blessing the house when i was alone!
ReplyDeletei've had my share of pregnancy announcements lately too. i thought summer was wedding season, not pregnancy season. weddings i can handle!
hope your husband isn't gone too long!
You are not the only one who doesn't get excited at everyone's else's good news regarding growing their family. I saw a girl today who I see maybe once a year and she is always pregnant. Glowing and pregnant. That just made me wonder all day long and feeling abandoned that I did not get to see my belly grow.
ReplyDeleteI really like your new background! It is easier to read.
Hope you sleep well tonight!
I love the new background - so fresh and pretty! And I'll echo everyone else in that it is much easier to read.
ReplyDeleteI always need a day anymore to get over a pregnancy announcement. There have been quite a few this Spring and Summer. I could use a break. If I could hear an announcement without the accompanying hurt, that would be a nice change.
ReplyDeleteYou know, I miss my husband too when he's not home. Just this Saturday, he was at a friend's house watching a pay-per-view fight. It felt abnormal to go to bed before he came home. Suffice it to say, when he's not home, I have a light on somewhere in the house. And my cat and dog are in the room.
Hey, I just wrote a post about handing pregnancy news a couple days ago! ("I'm not alone") I think you handle it exactly like the rest of us, and I'm really trying hard to convince myself that excitement for new pregnancies isn't insincere just because you also feel disappointed for yourself. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteYou got home from NY about the same time we got home from Boise! Too funny! I think pregnancy announcements are always hard and I think we're more likely to have conflicted feelings about another IF girl. I can't sleep at night when Paul's gone. I become completely nocturnal. Not sure how I'd be able to work. You're definitely in my prayers! And I like the new look.
ReplyDeleteI miss my husband when he's gone, and it messes up my schedule. He used to travel for work a lot, but he has traveled in a while, which makes me happy.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to not feel a tinge of jealousy, even when it's another IF girl (although IF girls announcements at least give me hope too).