We were sleeping next to my SIL's room and I could hear her 6 week old baby during the night making noises and it just broke my heart wishing I had what she has. Luckily I am not super depressed about everything right now but I just can't get my mind off of IF. Is it always going to be like this? I mean the constant thoughts of how to overcome IF....what's the answer to all of this?
After this long of IF no one talks to me about having children anymore. My MIL used to bring it up and even some of my SIL's but now I guess nobody knows what to say anymore so it is just kind of an ignored topic. Trust me I am an open book if anyone were to ask me about what's going on with IF thing. In fact sometimes I am dying to talk about things because it gets so painful and heavy to hold everything in. Do I need therapy? Haha!
Well, I guess I couldn't go all of my vacation without complaining about IF!
Today is actually a very cold 4th of July. Seriously, I am originally from CA and I have never experienced such a cold day for fireworks and celebration. Oh, last night we went out on Dh's best-friend's boat and watched some fireworks. It was so much fun!!! I did take pictures but I have to wait until I get home to post them. Ugh! I have tons of pictures I can't wait to show you girls.
Happy Fourth of July everyone. I am praying for you!
I know how you feel, it's a pain that is so really you can almost touch it.
ReplyDeleteJust keep hanging in there, holding on to God's word and trusting him to give you your own little basket full of joy.
I just suffered a second misscarriage, after 4 and a half years of trying, but I am more hopeful than now ever because is about something good in our lives.
Don't give up, talk to God if there's no one else to talk to and he will sooth your pains and heal your fears.
Happy 4th to you, too! I hope you are able to enjoy the fireworks tonight and enjoy some romantic time between yourself and DH- - one of the only perks to not having kids, you don't have to have them in tow when you want to have a "date night."
ReplyDeleteI hope tonight goes better. When you want to have a baby, it seems that no matter where or what you are doing, you want them here with you . . .NOW. It is hard to hope and wait not knowing what the future holds. I am sending prayers your way tonight! I hope you continue to enjoy your vacation!
ReplyDeleteThinking about you Amber. I know how hard it must be seeing all those babies. Praying for you!!! xo
ReplyDeleteI know EXACTLY what you mean about talking about it. I love talking about it with others, despite the fact that it's such an upsetting topic. I always feel better when I get the chance to.. like I may not have a pregnancy to talk about, but they care about me and still want to know how it's going.
ReplyDeleteWe were only about 45 minutes away from each other this weekend! I'm back at my parents' now, so it's more like an hour and half. I hope the rest of your trip isn't too difficult. I'm praying for you.
I know how you feel about wanting to talk about IF. I wish someone would ask me about it. There's no way on Earth I'm going to bring it up myself, but it would be nice not to be carrying it around as such a secret. I don't even know why it's a secret. I suppose the need to talk about it is the reason these blogs exist. You need to vent somewhere.
ReplyDelete